Leadership Connectors: Putting It All Together

When I first began the book Leadership Connectors, I framed it in the sense that these would be great skills to hone for the future, for when I become an administrator. What I didn't realize until a couple of chapters in is that these strategies and skills are useful for everyone. These aren't simply skills that a leader needs, or that an administrator needs. These are life skills that everyone need in order to build relationships, both personal and professional.

The six keys to building relationships are not isolated skills only to be practiced and utilized within the walls of a school or business. They are the tools and raw materials to be used when you are building the foundation for relationships. The authors highlighted each "connector" using a story of an administrator named Jeff as he enjoys his retirement dinner after 35 years working in schools. He reflects on his own experiences both before and during the dinner, aided by the stories told by people with whom he's worked. It's a motivating story, an experience I hope to have many years from now. It's both exciting and nerve-wracking to think of stepping into the arena of administration, but I do look forward to it.

To recap, the six keys, or leadership connectors, are:

• Communication
• Support
• Safety
• Competence
• Continuous Renewal
• Trust

You need them all to build successful, effective, interdependent relationships. Use them wisely.

PS: If you know me at all, you know I'm just dying to draw some sort of graphic organizer or diagram to display these six keys in a fun way. I'm sure you can picture it :)

Face-to-Face Class Meeting: Reflection

This past weekend's cohort meetings were informative, overwhelming, interesting, and...overwhelming again!

We started with a presentation about school law on Friday. It was mentioned several times by both the speaker and professors how we are entering into quite a different era of education than has ever been seen before. With today's technology, school law is that much more complicated. The presentation was incredibly informative, but, while I am still in the classroom, I hope I will not have to deal with some of the legal issues that were discussed until I am in administration. With that being said, it was really helpful to hear the presentation and, especially, be given the presentation in the handbook to refer to later. It was interesting to play "Stump the Lawyer" with various issues that have come up in school regarding: search and seizure, personnel issues, and more.

On Saturday, the day was broken into four segments. The first was focused on meeting management, where we discussed and participating in several activities that will help us all run more effective and collaborative meetings. I thought the discussions regarding planning the agenda and thinking about the process by which to accomplish goals at the meeting were very useful.

The second part of the day was quite interesting, but incredibly overwhelming. Dr. Kevin Torosian, supervisor of Child Welfare and Services in Central Unified came out to talk to us all about student discipline, our role in the procedures of suspensions and expulsions, and the Ed. Code. While it was A LOT of information, I really liked how Dr. Torosian presented it. He was direct, to the point, and very inspiring. One metaphor that I feel is worth repeating is how working with student discipline can often be like being a mediocre golfer. You don't make most of the shots, sometimes you hit it in the rough, or lose the ball entirely. However, every once in a while, you hit a shot that is just beautiful and the feeling that it gives you is enough to make you want to continue golfing. Working in education, especially in student discipline, you won't be able to reach every student all of the time. But, every so often, you will help a student change their life for the better, and that feeling will inspire you to continue. I really appreciated Dr. Torosian's perspectives and insight.

The next two parts of the training dealt with change/motion leadership and dealing with personnel issues using the FRISK model. Both of these were incredibly informative and I think will have real life application, both now as a teacher leader and when I become an administrator. Not that I'll be sending a FRISK letter to a fellow teacher anytime soon ;)

While I wouldn't have necessarily have chosen to spend about eight hours in class over the weekend, I was glad that it was well worth our time as a cohort. It was a TON of information, but all very relevant to our journey as leaders and administrators.

Leadership Connectors - Trust

Since I started this book, I've been waiting for a chapter all about trust. It makes sense, now, why this chapter followed all of the others. In order for a leader to be a person that people trust in, they must exhibit all of the other Leadership Connectors: communication, support, safety, competence, and continuous renewal. Without those, you will not be a leader that inspires or extends trust.

In several of the courses I've taken for my Master's, several of the professors have described Trust as a bank account. It takes a while to build up a balance of trust, small deposits now and again and eventually you'll have a solid level of trust. However, all of that trust can be withdrawn with, as the book describes, "just a word, just a sentence, or in one action." (p. 121).

This chapter also, not surprisingly, reminded me of the book The Speed of Trust by Stephen M.R. Covey. In the book, Covey describes the four cores of trust: integrity, intent, capabilities, and results. Throughout this chapter, I saw an echo of the effect that our thoughts, words, actions, and reactions can have on trust. I appreciated this chapter, because, as was mentioned, without trust, a leader cannot hope to be successful.

Some of the key learnings from this chapter that bear repeating:

• You don't have to like or agree with everyone, but you have to respect everyone.
  
• Say what you mean and mean what you say. Talk the talk AND walk the walk.
• "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all."
• Avoid gossip! Even seemingly harmless gossip.
• Value others and play to their strengths. This shows you know them well enough to know their strengths and it allows for teamwork.
• Never lie. Just don't do it. It's more work and never ends well. "No comment" is an acceptable thing to say.
• A "perceived betrayal" is as damaging to trust as an actual betrayal.
  
• If you make a mistake, own it, apologize for it, and then do NOT make the same mistake again.

Trust is crucial to being a leader. Build trust, take care of it, and keep it intact.

Leadership Connectors - Continuous Renewal

I've appreciated all of the chapters in Leadership Connectors so far, but this one really resonated with me. This chapter was all about how, as leaders, we have to be aware of and make an effort to build relationships. However, while the rest of the book has been more concerned with the relationships that are built with staff, teachers, parents, and students, this chapter focused on the relationship you build with yourself - your mind, body, and soul.

It's incredibly important as a leader to take care of the people at their school, but it's even more important to take care of yourself. You can't do your job unless you're healthy - both physically and mentally. There were some great tips in this chapter, all of which combine to give everyone a "playbook" to use.

Here were the key learnings that I picked up from this chapter:

• Pick your battles - Prioritize and keep your emotions in check. Do you really need to start a battle with the students who are a little loud in the cafeteria at lunch time? I found this part really important for teachers who are in the classroom still. If you don't learn how to pick your battles, you will spend far too much time putting out fires and dealing with small, annoying behaviors. Focus on the issues that truly need to be dealt with.
• REFLECT, REFLECT, REFLECT! - Learn from your actions and words, don't make the same mistakes. In order to make sure that you don't let your emotions get to you, you have to understand your emotions.
  
• Be proactive, not reactive!
• Know thyself! - Identify what makes you happy and surround yourself with it, Figure out what pushes your buttons and avoid it, Take a walk, Be conscious of your attitude - it's contagious.
• Don't overlook the importance of friends, family, and taking time for both. They are your support and your job, no matter how fulfilling or prestigious, cannot fill the hole that a lack of support would leave.
• Find a balance - no one can do it all. Organize and prioritize so that you can be effective and efficient. Manage your time and make a daily routine, leaving enough time for both work, family, and play. You'll burn out quickly if you don't develop this balance. Some ideas: keep your office clean and organized, enlist the help of assistants and colleagues to develop systems, focus on teaching and learning, not spending time putting out fires.
• Don't underestimate the value of your HEALTH. You can't be the person either your family or your job needs if you don't have your health. Exercise, eat well, and be aware of the messages your body sends you.

Leaders have a lot on their plate. Without taking the time to get to know yourself and what you need to feel rejuvenated, you're liable to run out of steam and end up not doing the best job you can do. Realize that no one is Superman without a little effort. Put time and organization into making and achieving goals, give yourself a break if something doesn't go as planned, and reflect on how you can do better next time. We're all human :)

Leadership Connectors - Competence

The phrase "fake it til you make it" is often uttered when people enter into a new position or situation. However, faking it can only take you so far. As discussed in Leadership Connectors, competence is something that can't be faked, though it can make or break a leadership role.

Competence is not knowing everything. Competence is being able to balance the knowledge you already have and the ability to gain more knowledge. Instead of claiming to know it all, it's best to know knowledgeable people that can help you learn what you don't know. While for a new leader, you might be tempted to come across as overly competent, that can actually work against you. It can create a divide between you and your staff, mainly due to what some might consider a big ego.

In order to add to your knowledge base, it's imperative to observe and reflect. We all make mistakes, but it's important to be able to learn from them and keep from making them again. We can learn learn from those around us - our peers leaders, teacher leaders, students, parents, community members, and all staff.

I think the greatest learnings from this chapter surround what we as leaders really do need to know:

• social/emotional intelligence - to communicate effectively and build relationships
• communication skills - in all means of communication, newsletters, emails, meetings
• reflection - identify and learn from your mistakes and successes
• kindness/respect
• knowledge of learning theory and teaching methodology - you must be an instructional leader
• organization/prioritization - good leaders orchestrate, not manipulate
  
• systematic thinking - school sites are systems full of classrooms and people who impact each other
• shared vision - work collaboratively with others and make sure that every decision that is made is in keeping with your collective vision
  
• humility - give credit to others when it's due, be genuine